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My bigest fear to start looking for a job now is being verbally abused by coworkers or a boss. Its not an easy thing to move on from. I try not to let it get to me but I can only fake the smile and pretend for so long before I break. I need to begin to let God help me to let go of the things that happened to me at my job. I know what people are gonna say its not your fault and just let go but its complicated. I need to stop wanting to fix it myself but that's all part of an ADD person if you screw up you want to make it right yourself. And if you can't get it right you feel miserable and think your worthless and don't deserve anything at all. Growing up with ADHD I had to make sure things were in order and if I screwed up Id get blamed for it and then feel awful. When your a girl and your different from all the other kids it really does have an affect on you. Trusting people and God is a big problem for me. Because if you were hurt by the people who you thought were your friends not Kim but others then its kind of hard to trust God. Ya but Hes always there waiting for me to come to my senses. People also tell me to be a victor not a victim I'm trying not to be a victim. When you need to feel loved and accepted t sometimes never come by your parents. So when your around people who have that love and accept you you want to hold onto it because it feels safe. And that feeling only last for a little while then you go back to the way things were and that's not so safe. Being around Karen Jimi Kimberly and Phillip make you feel loved, safe and accepted. If you don't feel loved at home or have love for yourself how are you supposed to feel Gods love.Its hard to rely totally on Him when you had to rely on yourself for so long. But I won't give up because I'm not a quitter.