Stuff

How do we stuff and stuff then wonder where, why, when and how we got to this place in our life. When did things really start to feel out of control. Was it because I felt awful about walking out of a friendship. Was it because I was belittled by bosses coeworkes and friends. Was it because my home life isnt great. Did it begin in college dorms when I was numbing out. Was it when I was at home on fall break and my rushed in my room and told me she would be back. Or is it the fact that I was begginning to give up on me and my ability to work and keep a job and to preform my dutties effectively. Was I giving upon myself because I didnt think I was capable of completing a task that was givin to me in a timely manner. Was I was giving up on myself because i felt like dirt.