I Run

I run to the ONE who who gives me life. 

I run to the ONE who brought me back from the dead. 

I run to the ONE  who lifts my head. 

I run to the ONE  who died for me.  

I run to the ONE  who rescued me. 

I  run to the ONE  who saved my soul. 

I  run to the ONE  whose name is JESUS CHRIST. 

I run to the ONE who gives me hope. 

I run to the ONE  who gives me peace.

I  run to the ONE  who gives me strength.

I run to the ONE who loves me. 

Gods Grace

In first grade I was diagnosed with ADHD. At the time of my diagnosis I didn't know the reason why I was so different from everyone else; I just know that I had a hard time staying focused and very soon after hearing the diagnosis, I was on several medications. In addition to ADHD, anxiety and depression would be added to the list of things that I would have to suffer from at a young age. My life was a challenge from the very beginning and I have always looked for ways to cope with it.

I grew up Catholic, and participated in the most important sacraments like baptism, reconciliation, communion, and confirmation. I was one of the first female altar servers at the church I went to.

In high school, I was the manager of the girls’ basketball team for 4 years. It became an obsession. The thought of not being apart of a team crippled me emotionally because my identify was based around basketball.   My freshman year at college, I kept seeing signs on the elevator for Fellowship of Christian Athletes.  Totally thought it was crazy and I didn't want to have anything to do with FCA.  I went to the event thinking and saying to myself, “Why am I here? I'm not a Christian or an athlete. This is crazy.”  This event would mark the beginning of my journey to learning more about Christ, but little did I know that my life would take a drastic turn before my journey would lead me to actually accepting him.  

Growing up, I said I would never drink or do drugs. My first year at college was when I was first introduced to alcohol and weed. It only took one drink for me to get hooked. The bottle became my god it's what I craved. I was so depressed and filled. With anxiety that I spent most days isolated. At the begging of my Junior year I found a non denominational church that helped begin my searching for Christ.  And really started attending FCA that year. I would continue to drink and numb out because I hated myself, but on June 1, 2006 my life changed.

It was the day after my birthday and I had way too much to drink. While lying on my friend’s floor, sick and drunk, I realized that I was an alcoholic. I asked God to help me and in that moment he took the urge to drink away from me completely.

God would continue to pursue me and love in spite of my past.  I would get hooked on following Little Big Town around the East Coast with an old friend. I thought that this would fill the void in my heart, but it didn't. I got my thrills at the concerts through the energy of the band. And at the time it was what I thought I needed, but honestly, it wasn't making me any happier.  Once I found MBC Silver Spring, I began to really understand Gods love for me.  In 2011 while caring for a sick friend she looked at me and asked if I knew where I was going when I died. I told her I think so. Those words kept coming back to me because in my head I believed I was a Christian but I wasn't sure. It wasn't until I had a reaction to a drug where the doctor said I possibly had a stroke because I had all the signs of one, that my life would begin to take a turn for the best. I realized that it was God's grace that protected me from having a stroke. So on that day I knew I had to change. I couldn't keep going through the motions. I needed God to be the center of my life.

On November 3, 2013 I finally grasped what it meant to “be saved.” Jesus came, died, was buried, and rose again in order to save us from our sin. I realized my need for forgiveness and I asked God to forgive me for my sins, and He did. Today I know for a fact that I'm forgiven, and that the same God who changed my life, can do the same for you.

Valentines Day with Emily and Little Big Town

Fun night with Emily and Little Big Town.  Met some cool fans.  Little Big Town won a Grammy for best Country group song Pontoon.  It was so cool seeing them again. It had been 2 years.  They put on an amazing show. When little Big Town shared news about the Grammy the crowd went wild for a about a minute it was so cool to see how really truly humble they are.  

Random thoughts

I miss the days of old when going to see Little Big Town would help me forget what was going on at home. I miss getting lost in the music and not having a care at that moment. I miss going to Walmart at 12 am and dancing down the aisle and breaking out little big town songs randomly. You see my friend of 13 years choose to stop being friends. So I have to ask God for help in letting go of the past and forgive her. It's tough when you want to go back to the good times and they aren't there anymore because they are just memories. So I am choosing to forgive Kim because its time to move on and let God do His work. It's tough to forgive when there had been a lot of hurt but it is necessary. I'm thankful for those times but i must forgive Kim and I am choosing to do so.
Dear Lord,
Lord please help me to forgive Kim so I can move on with my life. Lord help me to put my trust in You completely. Lord help me to surrender this to You. Lord take control of my life. Amen

Life

Just trying to figure things out. Sometimes I think it would be so nice not to have ADHD or a learning disability because then my life would be a bit easier. I am thankful for the church I go to and the friends I made. I also am thankful for my small group. But at times I think it would be nice to have friends here who really truly understand me and my shortcoming. Lately I have been struggling with unforgiveness of friendship that ended and I have some bitterness as well. I feel alone and I know God is with me but I feel like HE is so far away. I am really not sure what I am supposed to do anymore. I need God to take full control of my life. I want and need Him to be the center of my life. I'm thankful for my family and friends on twitter and Facebook.

A Glimpse into my life

Thank You Jesus For Saving me. 

Just a brief look into my life.  I hope everyone enjoys.

Psalm 94:19 When I am filled with cares Your comfort brings me joy.

Colossians 3:3 For you died to this life and your real life is hidden with Christ in God.

Proverbs 3:21-23 My child, hold on to your wisdom and insight. Never let them get away from you. They will provide you with life—a pleasant and happy life.  You can go safely on your way and never even stumble.

My Birthday Fun

Thank you GOD for my life and saving me. Thank you everyone who celebrated this day with me I am truly blessed.

Proverbs 3:21-23 My child don't lose sight of good planning and insight. Hang onto them for they fill you with life and bring you honor and respect. They keep you safe on your way and keep your feet from stumbling.

Psalm 100:3 Acknowledge that the LORD is GOD! HE made us, and we are HIS. We are HIS people, the sheep of HIS pasture.


Psalm 139:14 "Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous---and how well I know it."

1 Corinthians 16:13-14 "Be on guard. Stand true to what you believe. Be courageous. Be strong. And everything you do must be done with love."

Psalm 73:26 My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart; he is mine forever.

Romans 9.25 "I'll call nobodies & make them somebodies; I'll call the unloved & make them beloved."
 
Romans 8:28 And we know that GOD causes everything to work together for the good of those who love GOD and are called according to HIS purpose for them.  

My Life

A short video I did for my Small group. I hope you enjoy My Life


Song Only What You Make of It by Little Big Town





Romans 9:25 "I'll call nobodies and make them somebodies; I'll call the unloved and make them beloved."

Psalm 139:14 "Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous---and how well I know it."

1 Corinthians 16:13-14 "Be on guard. Stand true to what you believe. Be courageous. Be strong. And everything you do must be done with love."

Psalm 73:26 My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart; he is mine forever.

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all your heart do not depend on your own understanding. Seek HIS will in all you do and HE will direct your paths.

Proverbs 3:21-23 My child don't lose sight of good planning and insight. Hang onto them for they fill you with life and bring you honor and respect. They keep you safe on your way and keep your feet from stumbling.

Fun Day at th Park

Just Existing

Lately the last couple weeks I have felt like I have been just existing. Its like I'm in the middle between numb and just going through the motions. I don't know why I feel this way but maybe because its how I'm dealing with stress at home and in my life in general. Its almost like I'm here but not here. It may be partly from lack of sleep over the past couple months and its just hitting me now. Partly because I'm so stressed and ready for a break from my parents.


I hate getting yelled at for telling the dogs to stop barking. I mean you cant go up to a dog and say excuse me would you be so kind to please quit the barking. If that was the case then Id be scared. So to say the least I have been on edge all day due to lack of sleep and then this happens and makes me more on edge. I hate being on edge cause coming out takes a while. Right now I'm extremely edgy and anxious and ready just to pack my things and leave but what good would that do me since I have no place to go to get a way. You see I miss going to see Little Big Town in times like these because at least they helped me get away from home and forget for a little bit of time. But its not good to run away cause when you return its the same old stuff and that fun time seems so distant. So I think the best thing for me is to stay out of the way and keep my mouth shut. I know God has HIS reasons so I guess I'll keep trusting HIM.


Right now I have one good thing going for me is Church. Which is a pretty good escape for a couple hours. It has helped Keep me sane these past couple of weeks since I started going. I actually look forward to going to Church again which is a big GOD thing. They also created a group for new comers that has helped me a lot over the past couple weeks since life at home isn't great I can get encouraged there. The leader of the group rocks she has helped me a lot and has encouraged me to keep turning to GOD. I can actually talk which is a good thing and not feel like what I am saying is wrong or like it doesn't matter. Unlike my last Church where people tore me down when I had rough times and didn't build me up. I don't need to be in a place where I'm tore down. That's not what church is for. Its for lifting up encouraging loving people and showing GODS love.

Psalm 9:10 "Those who know Your Name will trust in YOU for You O LORD have never abandoned anyone who searches for YOU."

Psalm 71:14 "But I will keep hoping for YOU to help me I will praise YOU more and more."

Psalm 31:14 "But I am trusting in YOU O LORD saying 'YOU are my GOD!'"

Psalm 37:5 "Commit everything you do to the LORD. Trust HIM and HE will help you."

Psalm 18:30 "As for GOD HIS way is perfect."